


The Hat Oji-san

by YukiSkyes



Category: Naruto
Genre: A little angst, Adult Uchiha Sasuke, Comes prepackaged with a shitty childhood, Fluff, Gen, Kid Uzumaki Naruto, Protective Uchiha Sasuke, Time Travel, Uzumaki Naruto Needs a Hug, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:14:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21598231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YukiSkyes/pseuds/YukiSkyes
Summary: The first time Naruto met Hat Oji-san, it was when one of the stall owners nabbed him, spitting accusations of theft. All the times after…
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 84
Kudos: 604
Collections: Foxy fox 🦊, Team 7 🌀, Time Travel and World Travel





	1. The Mysterious Man

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, I'm thirsty for content where the more chill adult Sasuke befriends kid Naruto but I'm not finding any (unless some kind soul knows any and would like to drop a few titles, I'll be forever grateful) so I gotta bite the bullet and write it myself. I don't know how long this is gonna be.
> 
> Anyway, Boruto was fanfic before (yes, that includes chapter 700 and no, nothing you say or what Boruto shows me will ever change my mind) but with Sasuke's stint in the recent episodes, it's now _officially_ fanfic, so what I'm writing isn't really that far off anyway.

In a street not very far away was a commotion. In that street, pedestrians were reeling from the shock of the sudden storm of glitter that had just burst over their heads coating them in a layer thick enough to get into the smallest of crevices, promising several frustrating hours wasted on washing it all off.

Angry shouts filled the air, but Naruto had long since vacated the premises the moment he drank his full of the priceless expressions on the villagers’ faces.

Snickering to himself, he cautiously poked his head from the mouth of the narrow alleyway and seeing the coast was clear of any pursuers, he quickly scurried out.

What should he do next? Set up hidden wires to trip people? Scribble out signs? Oh, maybe he should switch the street signs around! Imagine how confused people would be!

His burst of laughter turned into a yelp as a sudden yank to his arm jerked him back.

He’d been caught already? Dang it, he shouldn’t have let his guard down!

Naruto swiveled to look at his captor, mouth open and ready to argue his way out of trouble. It never worked but at least he got to make full-fledged shinobi twitch.

However, the person who caught him this time was hardly shinobi. It was a civilian.

Naruto blinked in surprise. He didn’t think news travelled fast enough for this man to know what happened several streets down. The rage twisting his red face was a familiar one, though. Naruto resisted the urge to curl his stomach and avoid that gaze.

“I should’ve known,” the man spat. Naruto winced as prickles of pain shot up from how tightly the man gripped his wrist. “I saw you skulking around, so it must’ve been you who stole from my stall!”

Naruto gaped.

“I didn’t steal anything!”

The man shook his arm which shook Naruto as well, causing him to stumble and send an aching throb through his arm held in an angle that threatened to dislocate.

“Then what were you doing sneaking around? Don’t lie! Where is it, brat?”

“I don’t have it! I don’t even know what you’re talking about!” Naruto shouted, turning furious eyes at the man and attempting to wrestle his arm back. That only served to tighten the clamp around his wrist even more, and he let out a cry of pain.

The man jerked him closer to roar in his face, “DON’T LIE! You’re already an eyesore troublemaker! What wouldn’t you dare to do? If you give it up right now, I won’t go to the Hokage and have you thrown in prison like he should’ve done a long time ago!”

Naruto bit the inside of his mouth and concentrated on the pain rather than the burn in his eyes, continuing to fight and shout to prevent anyone from noticing the way he blinked too much.

Don’t look to the crowd for help. He’d never find it. Don’t cry. They’d only sneer at him. Don’t explain. They’d never listen. Most importantly, don’t agree. Never ever again.

“I didn’t do anything wrong! I didn’t steal anything!”

Naruto breathed hard, the indignant anger, fear, and helplessness clogging his throat. He squeezed his eyes closed but to his dismay, it didn’t stop the lone tear from leaking out. A hole opened in his stomach. He shouted louder.

“I DIDN’T STEAL ANYTHING! I DIDN’T STEAL ANYTHING! I DIDN’T STEAL ANYTHING!”

Naruto repeated his mantra to drown out the insults and threats screamed at him. Pain burst through his arm as the man wrenched his arm again, forcing out another cry of pain.

“I didn’t do anything wrong!” Naruto sobbed, hating how wet and miserable he sounded. “Let me go!”

“Let him go.”

Naruto froze, eyes snapping open as he was abruptly freed.

He snatched his arm back and cradled his wrist to his chest. It looked like he wore a thick, angry red bracelet which would no doubt turn purple later on with how hard it was crushed. Why was he suddenly released anyway?

He looked up at the tall man standing beside him. He was all black from his cloak to his hat to his hair to his only visible eye but his skin was really pale. The only other person he’d seen this pale was that stuck-up jerk in class.

Stall Guy frowned at the new, mysterious man and asked warily, “And who’re you?”

“No one you need to know,” the mysterious man replied in the same airy way that jerk, Sasuke, talked to other people when he could be bothered to do so: like they didn’t matter.

“Then why’re you butting into my business?” Stall Guy demanded.

Naruto was kind of curious too. No one had ever interrupted when he was in trouble for whatever reason.

“Because he didn’t do anything wrong.”

Naruto stared at the mysterious man in awe.

“You… you realize…” Stall Guy’s eyes flickered to Naruto, “ _who_ he is, don’t you?”

Naruto’s heart sank. He pranked people and he was quickly being known as a troublemaker, but he’d never _stolen_ anything before.

“I do, and I don’t care.”

The words were firm and confident. They echoed in Naruto’s ear and looped around his brain.

Didn’t care… didn’t care… didn’t care…

He couldn’t help but burst out, “Oji-san, you believe me?”

The mysterious man looked at him, and it could’ve been his imagination because this man’s face was as expressionless as the ones carved on Hokage Mountain, but he thought it became just a little bit warmer when their gazes met.

“Yes,” the mysterious man replied.

Naruto’s mouth stretched wide enough to split his flushed cheeks. He couldn’t stop staring at this man, wondering if he was real. He was the first person to take his side since Iruka-sensei, and he was a total stranger who wasn’t forced to care about him as his teacher!

“Wow… Thanks, oji-san!”

The mysterious man slowly nodded once and turned back to Stall Guy.

“Do you have evidence that Naruto was the one who stole your item?”

Stall Guy shook out of his shock and straightened with a scowl.

“Do you need evidence when you catch a thief red-handed?”

“If you’ve caught him in the act, you would’ve retrieved your item, which doesn’t seem like the case,” the mysterious man countered, walking over to the stall selling dolls.

Naruto hesitated then gave a tentative tug on his cloak as he passed before letting go like it burned when the mysterious man turned his attention to him.

He wasn’t really thinking when he did that except that he felt kind of bad holding this man up with that stall jerk so that for an instant, he forgot people hated when he touched them or their belongings let alone have him tug on them.

Naruto quickly searched the mysterious man’s expression for any hint of anger or disgust, but it didn’t seem to have changed.

“What is it?” the mysterious man asked over Stall Guy’s tirade. He sounded calm and patient. Naruto forgot what he wanted to say.

For some reason, the mysterious man’s lips quirked up slightly, and he reached over to pat him gently on the head.

Naruto openly gawked at him. Wha—Did he just—? Why—huh?

He almost missed the soft huff from the mysterious man before he returned his attention to the Stall Guy just as he started loudly demanding the mysterious man to leave.

Instead, the mysterious man grabbed the edge of the tablecloth and lifted it up to reveal a single doll lying in the dirt underneath.

Stall Guy went quiet.

“Next time, it’d be prudent to check your surroundings more thoroughly before throwing around baseless accusations at passersby,” the mysterious man said dryly.

Naruto didn't understand some of what he said, but whatever it meant, it made Stall Guy go red as he loudly said, “And how do I know the brat didn’t slip it under there or hide it on purpose?”

The mysterious man narrowed his eye, and even though his face didn’t change much, Naruto got this very distinct feeling that he was less than impressed with Stall Guy, who quailed under the _look_ and mumbled something before grabbing the doll and fleeing behind his booth.

“That was so cool! Can you teach me how to shut people up by looking at them too?” Naruto gushed, bouncing in excitement.

Amusement took away much of the hardness in the mysterious man’s face as he replied, “I think that’s a little too advanced for you to attempt.”

Naruto wanted to protest but a shout and the appearance of a green flak jacket down the street reminded him that, oh yeah, he was supposed to be running away for the prank he did earlier.

“Yikes!” Naruto squeaked, grabbing the mysterious man without thinking as he broke into a run the other way. He still had so many things he wanted to talk about!

They made a round of the village running and hiding. He kept expecting the mysterious man to shake him off or finally have enough of him. But the mysterious man didn’t say anything at any point and allowed Naruto to pull him around like it was a natural, everyday thing. Occasionally, the mysterious man would even guide him elsewhere just in time to avoid a pursuer or two.

They finally lost their tails at the park, and Naruto plopped on the swing with a happy sigh. He idly kicked off as he asked, “Hey, do you like pulling pranks?”

The mysterious man approached him and after some hesitation, sat on the swing beside him.

“Not particularly.”

“Oh.” Naruto scratched his head. “I thought maybe that was the reason why you helped me out and let me pull you around.” Then somewhat belatedly, “Um, thanks for that by the way. I don’t think I could’ve gotten away from that guy without you.”

The mysterious man nodded.

“It’s fine.”

Naruto leaned over with a grin.

“What’s your name?” He jabbed his thumb to his chest. “I’m Uzumaki Naruto!”

“I’m…” the mysterious man trailed off, diverting his eye. “Sorry, I can’t tell you.”

“Why? Are you a ninja on a secret mission?” Naruto leaned this way and that to make sure he hadn’t missed the glint of metal carved with the leaf symbol. “Is that why you’re not wearing your hitai-ate?”

“Something like that,” the mysterious man said vaguely.

“Wow! What kind of mission is it?” Naruto enthused, jumping to stand on the swing. “Are you spying on someone? Is there a super dangerous enemy you’re following around?”

The mysterious man’s lips quirked again. It was still kind of small but the smile was a lot more noticeable, and it had the same note of fondness that Iruka-sensei had in his smiles sometimes. Naruto didn’t really get why a stranger would be fond of him, but it wasn’t a bad feeling.

“Dobe, if it’s secret, how can I tell you?”

“What’d you call me?” Naruto screeched, the fuzzy tingle in his belly dropping off like a heavy stone to the foot. He hopped off the swing to stand firmly in front of the man, putting his hands on his hips. “I’m not a dobe! I’m going to be the next Hokage!”

“I know you’ll be.”

“I will! I don’t care what you say, I’ll show—”

The words finally caught up to his brain, and Naruto stopped with his mouth open. A wave seemed to crash over and into him, sweeping him off his feet.

A long pause followed as he tried to get a grip on his roiling emotions.

“Y-you think so?” he finally croaked out, and he hastily tried to cover it up. “You really think so?”

“Yeah, I do,” the mysterious man confirmed softly with the same assuredness he said it the first time.

“O-oh…”

Naruto never had anyone actually _believe_ he’d be able to do it. Even Iruka-sensei didn’t seem to believe it, only listening to him with an indulgent smile and a ruffle of his hair, much less the other villagers and his classmates who only knew him as the bottom of the barrel at the Academy.

Something ballooned in his heart, light enough that he could float. A beam broke across his face, and he laughed like he had never before.

“Yeah! Yeah, I will!” He puffed out his chest. “Oji-san, you have a good eye! I’ll be the greatest Hokage in the world!”

“That won’t be difficult.” The mysterious man smirked. “There’s only one Hokage in the world at a time, after all.”

“Are you on my side or are you making fun of me?” Naruto squawked, thrusting a fist in the air between them.

“Both.”

“What?!”

The mysterious man shook his head and stood.

“I have to go now.”

Naruto tried to quash his disappointment.

“Oh… okay.” He looked down and shuffled his feet. “Will I… will I see you again?”

The mysterious man shifted, and Naruto watched curiously as he lifted his hand and extended his arm to poke two fingers against his forehead. There was a definite smile on his stoic face.

“Until next time.”

Naruto reflexively brought his own hand against his forehead.

“Y-yeah.” He grinned, broad and excited. “Yeah! I’ll see you again! Bye, oji-san! Good luck with your mission!”

The mysterious man nodded and then Naruto was alone in the park but for once, unlike the other times he parted from the few friendly acquaintances he had, he didn’t feel lonely at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke: is genius elite ninja with overpowered abilities
> 
> Also Sasuke: this hat is the perfect disguise
> 
> What a goddamn dork.


	2. Hat Oji-san

Naruto stared at the flat rock in his hands.

He’d seen a bunch of kids at the river having a rock-skipping contest earlier. They were laughing and jostling one another, having fun. He couldn’t help but be drawn in, but it’d be a bad idea to go up to them. It always was.

Instead, he’d set up a spot further away upriver and skipped some rocks as well, glancing at the group every once in a while and pretending he was skipping rocks with them. A small part of him definitely hadn’t hoped they’d notice and invite him.

They were gone now, and Naruto was left alone in front of a river dyed orange by the setting sun, skipping stones by himself as he tried to imagine what it’d be like to do it with someone else.

“What’re you doing here?”

Naruto swiveled around at the familiar voice, a grin breaking out before he knew it.

“Hat Oji-san!”

Hat Oji-san quirked a brow at the name but otherwise didn’t react or comment, somewhat to Naruto’s disappointment.

“I was just skipping stones.” Naruto held up the rock in his hand. “Wanna join?”

He hadn’t even realized how tightly wound he was with anticipation until Hat Oji-san took the rock and flicked it over the water. It went all the way to the other side.

“Whoa! Amazing! None of the other kids made it to the other side!” Naruto cheered, vibrating in delight.

“Other kids?”

Naruto shrugged and searched around for a decently flat rock.

“Yeah, there was a bunch of them earlier. They’re gone now.”

Hat Oji-san hummed. Naruto found a good rock and got into position, tongue peeking out as he adjusted his body and his grip. He launched it as hard as he could. It skipped three times before sinking, an extra skip from his earlier attempts. He pouted.

“Darn it.”

“Try throwing lower and from your wrist instead of your arm,” Hat Oji-san suggested, stooping down for a rock. “It’d provide the spin it needs to skip.”

Naruto didn’t get what he meant by spin, but he watched Hat Oji-san do it again, his movements fluid from start to finish. The stone made it across the river.

“It’s a bit like throwing shuriken.”

Naruto perked his attention.

“Really? So, so if I can skip a rock to the other side, I can throw shuriken?” he asked excitedly.

If he learned this, would his shuriken actually reach the target or stop being so wildly off the mark?

“If you can master the wrist movement, you’d have the basics,” Hat Oji-san said. “The faster you can snap your wrist, the more your shuriken will spin and the farther it’d go.”

“Yeah! Let’s do that then!”

Hat Oji-san helped him pile up some rocks and they skipped them together. Hat Oji-san could do the coolest tricks like throwing a rock to hit the one skipping or knocking the stones into each other on the water so they bounced in different directions or making it so that _multiple_ stones all came together at one point.

“Do that again!” Naruto cheered.

Hat Oji-san obliged. The three stones skimmed over the surface before their paths curved to crash into one another.

“How did you _do_ that? I wanna do that too!”

Hat Oji-san smirked.

“Maybe I’ll teach you when you learn proper wrist movement.” Then in a lower voice, “You always use too much strength when you throw.”

“Well, I managed to skip the stone _seven_ times!” Naruto held up his fingers to underline that. “I’ll be on your level soon enough!”

“I look forward to it.” Hat Oji-san looked towards the sky, the fading light turning the river inky where the spots of streetlights failed to illuminate it. “It’s getting late. You should be getting home.”

The lightness Naruto felt from the earlier fun atmosphere dampened, and he looked away. He wasn’t quite ready to go yet.

“Nah, I think I’ll hang out here a little longer. You should go rest. You must be tired from your mission.”

He skipped a rock. He could barely see it anymore, so he counted the splashes instead. One, two, three, four, five.

“Let’s get dinner.”

Naruto whipped around to look at Hat Oji-san with wide eyes.

“Dinner? You want to have dinner… with _me?_ ”

Hat Oji-san nodded.

Naruto floundered. He’d never been invited to have dinner with anyone except Iruka-sensei. It’d be nice, great even, to have company other than him though. It was a nicer thought than going back to a dark, empty apartment just now, in any case.

He opened his mouth.

“We’re not getting ramen,” Hat Oji-san said flatly, somehow able to guess what he’d been thinking.

Naruto’s jaw snapped shut.

“Then what?” he asked, baffled.

There was a short pause before Hat Oji-san replied, “How about udon?”

“I’ve never really had udon,” Naruto said, trying to think back to the last time he’d had it or the last time he’d been in a restaurant period.

He still remembered the glasses of water spilled on him and the small portions with overcooked or undercooked food, like the chefs couldn’t be bothered. He finally decided never to eat at a restaurant again after his last trip gave him a stomachache that felt like someone was stabbing him. Plus, it was really uncomfortable eating with the glares people kept shooting him.

Ichiraku was the only place that accepted him unconditionally, and he was fine with that. Their food was the best in the world anyway! He couldn’t imagine what visiting a restaurant again would be like.

Unbidden, anxiety bubbled up like the fizz in soda.

“You can eat as much as you want, and I’ll pay for you.”

Naruto’s stomach let out a long, loud gurgle. Hunger won over anxiety, and he shoved it to the back of his mind.

“Then let’s go!”

He reached over to grab Hat Oji-san’s hand only to grab a fistful of cloak instead. At first, he thought Hat Oji-san had moved his arm away, but he hadn’t so much as shifted. He patted around with both hands, but he still couldn’t find anything resembling an arm.

Brows furrowed in confusion, he began to ask, “Hey, where’s your—oh.”

He clamped his mouth shut when he finally caught on. He peeked up at Hat Oji-san who returned his gaze calmly under the light of the streetlamps before holding aside his cloak to reveal the empty sleeve of his left side.

Naruto sucked in a breath.

It wasn’t as though he’d never seen people with missing limbs before. It was kind of impossible to live in a ninja village without seeing one or two of them around, but this was the first time someone... close? Hmm… what was Hat Oji-san to him anyway? Someone he cared about. Right. This was the first time a missing limb affected someone he cared about. A friend, maybe.

Naruto shivered at the thought of having a friend, a _real_ friend he could talk to and hang out with like everyone else had.

He reached tentatively towards the sleeve. When Hat Oji-san didn’t move away, he held the sleeve and followed it up with his gaze until he saw the section occupied by the stump somewhere near the elbow.

“Does it hurt?” he blurted out.

Hat Oji-san tilted his head somewhat to the side and replied, “I deal with it.”

Naruto pinched his brows together and rubbed the fabric between his thumb and forefinger. This must’ve really hurt. He scowled.

“Did you get the guy back?” he asked with some heat.

If he didn’t, Naruto would be more than happy to beat the guy up for him!

Above him, Hat Oji-san snorted, shoulders trembling slightly and thin lips parted in… laughter? Huh, Naruto almost thought he didn’t know how to laugh. He looked so serious a lot of the time but when he smiled or laughed, he looked… really kind.

Once Hat Oji-san’s laughter died down, he said with a strange tone of voice, “You should’ve seen him.”

“Good!” Naruto proclaimed loudly, satisfied. He released the sleeve and crossed his arms. “He deserves it!”

To his surprise however, Hat Oji-san said softly, “No, he really didn’t.”

Curiosity threatened to burn a hole through his head.

“What do you mean?”

To his frustration, Hat Oji-san only shook his head and began to walk away.

“Let’s go eat.”

“Wait, tell me what you mean!”

Naruto tried prying him for details the whole way to the restaurant. He even jumped on his back like he did with Iruka-sensei sometimes, but Hat Oji-san just kept going like he wasn’t even there. Despite how his pestering could get him a job at T&I, according to Iruka-sensei, Hat Oji-san wouldn’t crack. He was one tough acorn!

“We’re here. Get off.”

Naruto complied with a grumble, examining the restaurant they stood in front of.

It was kind of small and out of the way with a lit lantern like Ichiraku, except it was red and said “udon”, and a paper screen which Hat Oji-san slid open to step inside. The chef in the kitchen behind the counter greeted him as he entered, likely failing to spot Naruto sticking closely behind.

When Hat Oji-san took his seat, Naruto hesitated before sliding into the one next to him.

“What do you want?” Hat Oji-san asked, gesturing to the wooden boards on the wall written with all the food the restaurant served as well as their prices beneath.

Naruto looked at it, but he couldn’t help letting his gaze wander to the two chefs standing closely together and watching him with blank expressions he _knew_ meant disapproval. His stomach squeezed and suddenly, he wasn’t so hungry anymore.

He turned to Hat Oji-san to tell him so, but to his surprise, he was staring intensely at the chefs, as though daring them to say something. He broke away from them when Naruto looked at him.

“Did you decide?”

“U-um, that one.”

Naruto pointed to a random item on the menu.

Hat Oji-san raised his head to see what it was and snorted.

“One kitsune udon and one zaru udon.”

Without a word, one of the chefs nodded and got to work while the other placed two glasses of water in front of them before going to attend a customer further inside.

Naruto let out a breath and relaxed with a grin. He drummed his fingers on the countertop.

“Sooo,” he pointed to his own right eye to indicate the eyepatch Hat Oji-san wore that could barely be seen under the hair covering it, “can you tell me what happened to your eye? Or is that a secret too?” he grumped.

He stared at Hat Oji-san expectantly, but he didn’t respond. Naruto waited. The silence dragged on long enough that he felt it itching under his skin. He bounced his leg and drummed his fingers faster.

“Are—”

“I exchanged it with a god for the power to save the world.”

Naruto’s eyes widened in amazement.

“Wow, really?!”

Hat Oji-san took a sip of water and didn’t reply.

“You’re making fun of me again, aren’t you?!” Naruto exploded, thumping a fist against the tabletop. Water sloshed over the edge of his glass. He ignored the dirty looks that immediately zoned in on him to jab a finger at Hat Oji-san. “Tell me what _really_ happened!”

Hat Oji-san arched a brow at him.

“I just did.”

“Liar!”

For some weird reason, Hat Oji-san gave a faint smile at that.

“Am I?”

“The biggest!” Naruto insisted, crossing his arms with a pout.

“We’ll see about that,” Hat Oji-san said, not sorry at all about being the biggest liar in the world.

What did he even mean by “we’ll see about that”? It was true!

“Whatever! I bet it was because of something lame, like falling on a rock or you poked it out with your own kunai, and that’s why you don’t want to tell me!” Naruto harrumphed as their orders were placed in front of them.

The smell that wafted from his bowl made his stomach gurgle again. He was _so_ hungry. Who cared about a stupid eyepatch anyway when there was food?

“Mmm, looks delicious!” He barely remembered to say, “Itadakimasu!” before snatching up the chopsticks and digging in.

The flavor that immediately flooded his mouth made his mind reel, and stars popped in his vision. It wasn’t as heavy as ramen, but it was still rich and heavenly. The noodles were also springy and smooth, easy to slurp and swallow.

“It’s so good!” he exclaimed through a mouthful of food. “I didn’t know udon could taste this good! It’s all suwasuwa in my mouth!”

“Then eat up.”

Naruto did. He ate like the village would burn down if he didn’t, like enemy ninja would crash through the place at any second, like the food would disappear if he was too slow.

Finally, after his fourth bowl, he couldn’t eat anymore, and he sat back with a satisfied smile and a pat to his round tummy.

“Gouchisooou,” Naruto sighed. “That was so good.” He glanced over at Hat Oji-san who hadn’t ordered seconds after finishing his zaru udon. “Are you sure only one is enough?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” Hat Oji-san said, eyeing his empty bowl.

“Hey, are you going back on your promise to pay? No take-backs! You already said you would!” Naruto pressed.

“I wasn’t going to,” Hat Oji-san said, cloak rustling as he rifled about underneath it.

“Good,” Naruto said with a firm nod and crossed arms. “You should _always_ keep promises!”

“Is that so?” Hat Oji-san hummed as he took out some money to give to the chef.

“Yeah! Promises are your resolve!” Naruto raised a fist. “If you make one, you _have_ to do it or else you’re just a liar!” He scratched the back of his head. “Well, you _are_ a liar, but not a bad guy liar, so it’s okay!”

Hat Oji-san’s lips twitched upward.

“Thanks.”

Naruto grinned.

“No problem!”

They got up and headed out. Naruto waved to the chefs as they left.

“Bye! Thanks for the food! Your udon is the best in the whole village! It’s amazing!”

The chefs gave uncertain, wavering smiles, looking reluctantly happy before the sliding doors shut them from view.

Together, they started walking through the darkened streets.

“Thanks for the meal, Hat Oji-san! I owe you one!” Naruto said with a stretch before bringing his arms behind his head.

“No, it’s fine.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay! You introduced me to a great restaurant! I haven’t eaten anything this good since Ichiraku!” Naruto insisted, patting his stomach again.

He didn’t know how exactly he was going to repay Hat Oji-san, but he’ll think of something.

Hat Oji-san’s face did something weird.

“Naruto…”

Naruto tipped his head for a better look at him. It was kind of hard to see his expression properly with that hat casting shadows over it.

“Yeah?”

“… No, never mind. I’ll take you somewhere else another time.”

Naruto lit up.

“Really?!”

“It’s a promise.”

“WHOOO! Yeah!” Naruto threw his arms up and danced. He pranced around on the road, so ecstatic he could burst or fly. “Thanks a bunch, Hat Oji-san!”

Hat Oji-san huffed.

“No problem.”

They continued together for a little while longer. Hat Oji-san didn’t say anything else on the way home, but Naruto filled the silence with some singing, too happy to keep it inside. He was practically skipping.

“Ah, that’s where I live!” Naruto pointed out the building sticking up like a trundling monster over the top of the other houses. “I’ll see you later! Bye!”

He ran ahead, waving enthusiastically behind him as he went. Hat Oji-san waved back under one of the streetlights.

His gentle silhouette burned itself in Naruto’s mind.


	3. The Test

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one really fought me, and I'm still not really satisfied, but I can't pinpoint _what_ exactly it is that makes me unhappy with it. I might edit this later if I figure out a better way to write this but until then, hope you all enjoy it anyway!

The large number seventeen blared at him from the paper in front of him. It was bright red, thick, and it was out of a total of a hundred. Beneath it were countless smaller red X’s next to sloppy answers scrawled in messy handwriting when the space provided weren’t left totally blank at all. He only got a few questions right but most of his grade was pieced together from partially correct answers.

Blah, blah. Whatever.

There was a note at the end of the paper asking him to meet Iruka-sensei after class.

Naruto’s heart sank as he stuffed the test in his bag as his classmates compared scores. All the girls were already cooing over Sasuke’s _perfect_ grade, and the bastard didn’t even have the decency to look pleased about it. As usual when they got their tests back, he had on a small frown like he was dissatisfied about it instead.

Naruto scowled and slumped in his seat as Iruka-sensei started talking. He couldn’t pay attention to the rest of the lesson and when class finished, he sped right out without waiting.

What was the point? He already knew what Iruka-sensei was going to say anyway. He’d suggest make-up tutoring sessions, and Naruto was going to do okay for a while but then his grades would drop again. Rinse, wash, repeat.

Anyway, tests were stupid. They asked questions like “what’s the protocol if you’re separated from your teammates in enemy territory” and expected only _one_ answer! There could be a million different things going on! What if you were supposed to separate? What if you were in a rush? What if your teammates sucked? How was Naruto supposed to know?!

In the end, he’d get caught up thinking about it so much that he’d forget which answer the test wanted and then he’d get stuck on other questions that made no sense to him or he didn’t know the answer to and then he’d run out of time and then he’d fail.

Naruto slowed his steps once he was far enough away from the Academy, a lead weight in his stomach.

But still… Iruka-sensei had worked really hard with him, and he was always patient when he taught too. If Naruto didn’t understand something, Iruka-sensei was willing to explain it five times in five different ways until he finally did get it. But it just… didn’t seem like it was worth all the effort when the tests were dumb anyhow.

Naruto reached into his bag and withdrew his crinkled test paper. He bit his lip.

Should he go back? Iruka-sensei should still be at the Academy… He should apologize for ditching. But it felt so meaningless. Go back or not? Go back or not?

“I see you haven’t been studying.”

Naruto jumped and yelped. He spun around to glare at Hat Oji-san who was suddenly behind him.

“Don’t sneak up on me like that!” Naruto exclaimed, balling up the test and shoving it in his pocket.

It wasn’t that he was embarrassed about his score or anything… Okay, so maybe he didn’t want Hat Oji-san to think he was stupid too. He finally met someone who thought he could be Hokage! He didn’t want to ruin that with a stupid number on a piece of paper!

“I’m shinobi,” Hat Oji-san said with some amusement.

“Yeah, well… whatever! Don’t do that!” Naruto grumbled, fidgeting under his dark gaze.

Hat Oji-san had this skill that felt like he could see through anything, and Naruto usually thought it was really cool but right now, it just made him feel kind of small and caged.

“What?” he snapped and instantly regretted it.

He didn’t want to chase away the only friend he had. What if Hat Oji-san thought he was a rude brat and never bothered with him again?

Before the panic could set in beyond the flutter of his heart, however, Hat Oji-san said out of nowhere, “Let’s get some ice-cream.”

Naruto blinked, too surprised to follow Hat Oji-san as he began to walk away.

Where did that come from?

“Do you not want any?” Hat Oji-san asked when he realized Naruto wasn’t following.

“Y-yeah! Coming!”

No way was Naruto going to pass up on ice-cream.

He trailed behind Hat Oji-san as they made their way through the busy afternoon streets. This time of day, it was full of shoppers, people loitering around, off and on-duty shinobi, and kids let off from lessons.

Hat Oji-san drew a lot of stares as he walked by, and Naruto was grateful the attention was on someone else for a change.

They arrived at an ice-cream shop squished between a barber shop and a bookstore; easy to miss if someone wasn’t looking closely.

Hat Oji-san let Naruto pick whichever flavors he wanted but didn’t order any for himself, saying he didn’t like sweets, which was a crime. Who didn’t like sweets?!

Once Naruto got his three scoop cone drizzled with chocolate sauce and covered in sprinkles, they sat outside on the small bench to enjoy the good weather. He licked long stripes up his cold treat as he watched people pass by without so much as a glance at him. He relaxed.

It wasn’t often he got to enjoy something as luxurious as ice-cream, and it was even less often he got to walk down a street as busy as it was now without people whispering about him and staring at him. It did make him feel better, at least enough that the frustrated squeeze in his chest loosened up a bit, but it didn’t do anything to get rid of the heaviness still sitting in his belly.

“Um… sorry about earlier,” Naruto began, idly turning the cone around to the side the ice-cream threatened to topple towards. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

“It’s fine,” Hat Oji-san said. Then with some awkward hesitation, “Why… were you upset?”

Should Naruto tell him? He didn’t want Hat Oji-san to look down on him, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t already seen the score on the test, and he still treated him to ice-cream. He probably figured Naruto was upset over it and treated him to cheer him up.

Naruto sighed and dug out the balled up test paper before handing it over.

Hat Oji-san placed it on his lap, picked it open, shook it out, and smoothed it over on his thigh. His eye skimmed over it, finally coming to a stop at the bottom with the note.

“I ditched Iruka-sensei,” Naruto admitted glumly. “He was going to give me make-up lessons, but it felt stupid, so I left.”

He half expected Hat Oji-san to be all judgy or snooty about all the blank spaces and the incorrect answers but all Hat Oji-san did was ask, “Why did it feel stupid?”

The space between Naruto's shoulders loosened up, but he faltered when he didn't know what to say. He wasn't sure he could explain it properly. Words were hard and they couldn’t seem to keep up with his thoughts and feelings. Sometimes, words didn't feel large enough to express his meaning. No one would have the patience to sit there while he picked everything out anyway, least of all him, so he groaned out, “I don’t know! It just is!”

He wolfed down the rest of the rainbow sherbet scoop. The fruity chill made his tongue tingle, and he focused on that instead of the sour taste this conversation left in his mouth.

He got ready to be told he didn't make any sense but instead, Hat Oji-san said, “Hn, I do agree that there are materials aspiring ninja should ingrain in their minds."

Naruto lowered his ice-cream with a loud, annoyed sigh, unsure if he'd rather be told he was being stubborn or to be urged into trying to explain himself slowly. He didn’t know what “aspiring” or “ingrain” meant, but he got the gist of the sentence enough to know he was saying something an awful lot like what Iruka-sensei would nag about. It wasn't super unexpected, but he didn’t need to be lectured by Hat Oji-san too.

“But,” Hat Oji-san continued on, “tests aren’t always an accurate gauge of understanding.”

Naruto straightened and leaned over eagerly. He didn’t know what “gauge” is, but he liked the sound of the rest of what he said.

“Oooh?!”

Was an adult actually agreeing with him that tests were dumb?

Hat Oji-san shot him a somewhat dry look that immediately curbed his excitement, and he withdrew with a pout.

“That’s still not to say tests are useless or you shouldn’t put in effort,” he said, pointing to one of the questions. “You put, ‘Beat them up’, for the question asking you the protocol if enemy shinobi was following you or your team on the way back.”

“Well, yeah,” Naruto said with a roll of his eyes. “It’s not like you can bring them home, right?”

“No, you can’t,” Hat Oji-san agreed. “But if you did exactly as you answered on the test out in the field, it could lead to the death of yourself or your team. That’s why these tests exist. It’s to ensure you have the basic knowledge for survival.”

Naruto hunched over, frustration churning in his gut.

“Yeah, I know,” he mumbled, finishing the chocolate scoop.

It wasn’t his fault that he was bad at memorizing stuff, and that’s what half the tests asked from him.

He’d just started on his cookie dough when Hat Oji-san began slowly, “I was once pursued by enemy shinobi on the way back to base.”

Naruto perked up. He lifted his attention from his ice-cream to Hat Oji-san who stared out to the street.

“Really? Were you on a mission? What kind of mission was it? Who were you fighting? What were you doing? What happened?”

Hat Oji-san pursed his lips as though he didn’t want to tell him even though he was the one who brought it up in the first place before slowly saying, “I was on reconnaissance—information-gathering,” he added when Naruto stared blankly at him. “I detected three shinobi following me.”

“You beat them, right?” Naruto said loudly, punching the air in front of him.

“No,” Hat Oji-san replied firmly. “Given that I was returning from recon, the likelihood they’re enemy is high but if they were pursuing me, they did a poor job of concealing themselves until the moment they needed to strike or until I led them to my base. The situation was ambig—unclear.”

Naruto took a thoughtful lick of his ice-cream.

Obviously, they’d still be enemies, or at least, that was what he’d immediately thought, but the more he turned it over in his head, the more uncertain he was.

“So what’d you do?”

“I needed more information, so I led them around and used genjutsu to find out more about them.”

“Uh-huh? And what’d you find out about them?” Naruto asked eagerly.

“They were dressed similarly to the group I was gathering intel on but their fighting seemed self-taught and their jutsu lacked control. I finally confronted them and discovered they were the best three fighters one of the nearby small villages had. They were scared of the other group and came after me thinking I was one of them.”

Hat Oji-san glanced at him.

“Had I immediately retaliated, I would’ve injured innocent people. Do you understand?”

Naruto nodded, the pit of his stomach squirming.

“The first thing a shinobi should do in any situation is to gather as much information as you can. Only then can you make a decision and take action,” Hat Oji-san said.

“Yeah, I get it…”

Naruto would rather give people the benefit of a doubt than accidentally hurt the wrong ones.

“As long as you know.” Hat Oji-san gave a pointed look at his hand. “Your ice-cream is dripping.”

Naruto startled and quickly lapped up the escaping drops of sugary cream before finishing the rest of the ice-cream. He licked his fingers and asked, “So… you got any more stories?” He turned more fully towards Hat Oji-san, the beginnings of giddiness worming its way through him. “I wanna hear the cool ones where you fight the enemy ninja!”

Hat Oji-san hummed and pointed at another part of the paper.

“For this other question about proper methods of concealment,” he smirked, highly amused for some reason, “I can tell you what not to do based on what an old friend of mine did in the past…”

They spent the rest of the afternoon reviewing the answers on the test through Hat Oji-san’s experience. He had a lot of interesting and thrilling stories to share, and Naruto found out it was a lot easier to learn all this stuff if there was a story about it. He never thought he’d be happy to sit around and learn things, but he was glad for it. 

Not once did Hat Oji-san make him feel stupid for not knowing things nor did he glare at him when Naruto interrupted with questions. Like Iruka-sensei, he simply answered until he understood. He didn't know how much of a relief it was until he realized how he could hardly keep still with the excitement bursting like fireworks in his chest; how much _fun_ he was actually having.

When they finally finished, Naruto couldn’t help being a bit disappointed.

“Thanks for the stories, oji-san!” he thanked nonetheless, carefully putting the test away again.

The sky had gone a faded orange and blue. Instead of shoppers, the streets were now filled with civilians going home from work or going to dinner and stationed shinobi being let on or off their rotation.

Hat Oji-san nodded.

“I’m glad to help.”

“I never have this much fun reviewing with Iruka-sensei! Ah…”

Naruto wilted. He’d forgotten he’d bailed out on him earlier. What was Iruka-sensei going to say? What was _Naruto_ supposed to say? After all that time and effort Iruka-sensei had put in him, he’d blown him off. What if Iruka-sensei never wanted to help him ever again?

“It’ll be fine,” Hat Oji-san assured, somehow sounding confident.

“How do you know that?” Naruto mumbled, scuffing the toe of his sandals into the ground.

There was a slight smile on Hat Oji-san’s face as he said, “Iruka-sensei cares about you. He wouldn’t have asked to see you if he didn’t. It’d take more than this to get him to stop caring. But I think if you showed him what you learned today, he’d forgive you.”

Naruto brightened with a gasp.

“Oh, yeah! I could show him the test with all the right answers and-and-and… finish my homework too, I guess,” he finished in a grumble. “Anyway!” he continued on loudly. “Can you tell me more stories in the future?”

Hat Oji-san tipped his head and replied, “I suppose I don’t mind, but there are some details I can’t tell you.”

“That’s fine!” Naruto beamed and jumped off the bench, waving his arms. “Next time, tell me more about the missions where you beat people up!” he exclaimed, swinging his fists around.

Hat Oji-san stood and flicked Naruto on the forehead. Naruto gave an indignant cry and clutched it reflexively. Hat Oji-san only smirked at his pout, much to his chagrin.

“We’ll see how well you do on your assignments and tests.”

“Oh?” Naruto grinned. “So you’ll tell me if I do good?” His eyes caught on the fall of black hair covering the eyepatch. “Will you tell me what _really_ happened to your eye or your arm if I… hmm… if I get like, a hundred on a test?”

“I already told you what happened,” Hat Oji-san sighed.

“Yeah right! Only babies would fall for that! C’mon! Do we have a deal or not?” Naruto wheedled.

Hat Oji-san hesitated, eye flickering to the side as he considered it. Naruto held his breath.

Finally, after a long while, he relented slowly with a simple, “We’ll see.”

Naruto punched the air.

“Yes!”

“But only if you can get a perfect score on a test,” Hat Oji-san reminded him sternly.

Naruto pounded his chest and straightened.

“Don’t underestimate me! You’ll see! I’ll study super hard and get a hundred and then you’ll _have_ to tell me!”

“Hn, as if I could ever underestimate you,” Hat Oji-san murmured.

“Good!” Naruto pointed at him in challenge. “Be prepared to spill all your secrets! I’ll see you later! I gotta _study!_ ”

He raced off, heart pounding with the determination to find out more about his newest friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just assume the mission Sasuke talks about is something he did while being a vagabond hobo.


End file.
